Cacio e Pepe: Page 290

Some time when we weren't looking an important milestone passed: the iconic blue box went from mandatory staple to nostalgic side dish. The worst part of it all is that we end up throwing more than half of it away. Since food waste is a thing for me, we needed an upgraded version for the lobster roll eaters and blueberry vanilla goat cheese demanders. Enter stage left: cacio e pepe. 

Alright, this should be easy. How much more can there be to learn about boiling some pasta and adding cheese? I mean, really, it's just fancy mac and cheese, call it what you like... 

1. Boil the water. THEN add the salt. Wait, what? The internet tells me this is because salt is corrosive (right, got that) and can damage my pan. Ok. Sure. I asked my brother (PhD in materials science and engineering. Sure, if he's a Doctor, I'm a scientist because MLIS. Sibling rivalry is so attractive in midlife.) It goes like this:

Me: Ok, so I'm reading this book and it is telling me to add salt to my pasta water after it boils because salt is corrosive and will pit my pans? Wouldn't the salt have to be in there longer than it takes for the water to boil and dissolve the salt to cause such problems?

Useful Brother: Complicated answer. Is your cookware expensive and what is it made of? And don't you remember my speech from college on this topic?

Me: F no. My cookware is expensive and it's made of metal. 

Pedantic Brother: What kind of metal? Stainless? Aluminum? Clad?

Me: Stainless. 

V. Helpful but Slightly Annoying Brother: K then it matters more. Salt in cold water takes time to dissolve. If you add in cooler water some settles and as it dissolves is more concentrated right at the metal surface. At higher concentrations the stainless will depassivate locally and can pit. Solubility is exponential with temperature. So if you add the salt when the water is hot it will dissolve much faster and distribute evenly preventing localization. But its still more important to wash the damn things right away. Cause leaving dirty salty food in there on the surface is way worse. Soaking is stupid.

Me, petulantly: You're boring. It's no wonder no one remembers your little speech. 

*****

He's helping. Really. (It's so freaking annoying though, right?) We have learned a new word, that the boiling water distributes the salt evenly in our water which probably salts the pasta more evenly, and that we are lazy turds wrecking our pans with our soaking ways. 

2. Taste the water. It should taste like 'the summer sea'. I threw in a palmful of salt, tasted, and ADDED ANOTHER palmful before it tasted like 'the summer sea'. 

3. Boil the pasta to al dente. Save some starchy pasta water. This is a pain and gets another dish dirty so I have this little trick:





4. Then there is this curious mixture of starchy water and oil and 1 whole tablespoon of pepper (more on this soon). The genius of this step is adding the starchy water to the oil and letting to cook together to form an emulsion. Did you see that? We make an emulsion without whisking or getting out the food processor. Have you made an emulsion? You can do this, really, you can. 

5. Since we live in Wisconsin and are cooking for rotten kids, we considered the sheep cheese (pecorino) that the recipe called for and decided to swap in Parmesan. Our author is correct: you should spend all the money you possibly can on cheese. 

6. Mix the pasta in, add the cheese by the handful. Dig in the freezer until you find the parsley bag. Know that it's a bit silly that you still have this bag that your mom wrote on in 2011. But just keep that bag. It's holding some shit together when you just need a little help. Also, feel slightly chagrined for being a snot to your v. helpful brother who understands why you have this bag in your freezer.

Devour the pasta. It's good. But reader, I have veered form the path I set out. The only thing to do is to do it again, with the sheep cheese and without the parsley. And probably just half the pepper. Because dude, that was a lot of pepper. 

I'm going to make proper Sunday dinner this week. I'm looking at those menus in the back of the book and will let you know if I'm going to tackle one. But meanwhile, Patty is going to get her emulsion on the hard way and make the Caesar Dressing. Apparently there is some sort of anchovy problem to be solved there, but I'm sure she will triumph. 

xo-

c.

ps - Dispose of cheese buying receipts immediately or you may need to make a hasty exit.

pps- I checked the recipe twice. Samin did not tell me what to do with the burned pasta that I forgot to stir. 

ppps - I've been holding out you on. I made the Bright Cabbage Slaw and mixed in some shrimp. It was bright and pretty and delicious. You should make it while you are thinking about where you're going to source the cheese for this recipe if you can't call Joanne. 

pppps - I've Shakespeare on the brain today because of that first folio. Wanna go in together? 

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