I thought it was a good idea to make caramel. (Ha. I just typed 'eat caramel' instead of make caramel. Subtle foreshadowing.) These cookies look so delicious. Honestly, how hard could it be?

I did my homework. The key is not to overcook it. Like this.

Ah. Much better.

But, oh, the humanity! Use the proper tools, girl! (Truly, I *should* be embarrassed to confess that I moved the metal bowl out of the way to grab this sweet pink one.)

Now it is time to be eternally thankful that your husband is upstairs reading a story to your son. And that your sister-in-law has called and is listening to the steady stream of profanity coming out of your mouth and asking 'is that going to be on the blog?' But it works out, because she puts your brother, the PhD materials engineer on to help you figure out how to remove sugar, corn syrup and plastic from your ceramic top stove without asking your husband for paint thinner.

But not to worry, it's all chemically incompatible with the ceramic on the stove. I was able to break the physical joints with ice, and since the ceramic isn't cracked, no chemical joints formed. (Look at all that materials knowledge. I even know what a polymer is.) The ice helped the burns on my fingers, too. But then the sweet, helpful brother, sensing the crisis is averted and his dear sister will remain married says, 'dry ice would work really well. You don't have any of that, do you?'

And I'm all out of heavy cream, too.